The Far Side of Funny

An air-powered grappling hook is something you generally don’t see outside of a James Bond movie. But consider, for a minute, the canyon between very young children and the rest of us.

Let’s fire this bad boy across the gap and see what happens! Sure, you still have to harness up, clip on and get across, but you’ll have a whole new world to explore as you see-

The Far Side of Funny

You folks know that I administrate the preschool Chris and I started years ago.

Some times I just laugh my head off at my job. So many of these are “YouGottaBeThere” kind of moments, but let’s see  if I can illustrate some of them for you.  There are actually categories that staff and I come up with. Here are some:

Future Prom Date Pictures:

Joseph, age 2. Gerber baby, blonde haired, blue eyed, very attractive parents, simply a beautiful boy. The first thing he loves to do in the morning is jump into his “Tinkerbell” outfit and get into the stillettos. The orange safety goggles complete the ensemble.

Justin R. and Justin S.  Both are four. Both generally arrive at the same time, take off their jackets, store their lunches, and promptly pound the daylights out of each other. The fisticuffs are genuine, without a word exchanged! When they are separated, one sits on the Dora couch, the other on the crying pillow, and they stare across the divide, bare their teeth and growl at each other.

J.T. , age eleven months. You know those little baby bouncers? The ones with the steel springs on four sides of the seat and toys to play with across the dashboard? J.T. split one of the springs, he bounced his 23 pound body so hard. The sight of him cocked to the side, the startled expression on his face-priceless. I thought those springs would hold back a plane.

Billy, age four, to Cody, age 3. “You be the bride and I’ll wear the veil. Give it to me before I punch you!”

Goofy Language Stuff

Leila to Faith ( my 17 year old daughter). Would your mommy adopt me? Then you can be my mommy!

17 year old daughter Abi to Rosie, age 2- (Pointing to me) See Rosie? That’s my mommy!

Rosie: “Nooo! You don’t have a mommy, you’re too old!”

Katherine, age 4, to brother Reagan, age 3. “Give me the scooter! You’ve had it for a bajillion years!”

Timmy, age 5, to anyone in general: “If you get old enough, you can live here too!”

Hysterical Human Development

Aiden, age 5, to Dylan, age 5. “My Daddy calls it a banana hammock!”

Annabelle, pointing to her nose, her armpits and her back- “Mommy says when boys get old they get hair here-here- and here!

Fiona, to me, in  a quavering voice- “Do babies really come out your belly button?”

Olivia, overhearing- “No! Dummy! You poop them out!”

Me, changing the tiniest among us, a wee little creature named Jack. After all these years, you’d think I would know better. I open the sodden diaper, the cool air hits it and yep, Jack lets loose a perfect stream that lands squarely on his forehead. It still amazes me that little boys can pee on their own faces.

Hee-hee, much love from the Far Side of Funny.



3 thoughts on “The Far Side of Funny

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