Faces of Love: The Unlikely Joy of Peter Wiebe
Love: The Blessing and the Curse
To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal.
Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.
C.S. Lewis. (Isn’t that true? And so terrifying. To love anyone is to risk having your heart shredded.)
It’s nice to see you, fellow Visitors. During the Sabbatical in a Teacup I mentioned to you that I had met some remarkable people in this oddly wonderful blogging community. I’d like to introduce you to one that I met a while ago, a gentleman named Peter Wiebe, who writes thresholdofheaven.com.
Peter lost his oldest son Jesse to a rare form of childhood leukemia on May 11, 2011.
Peter’s blog is a chronicle of thoughts and actions during his son’s journey to heaven. Peter is a dedicated Christian, and, like me, has had his faith sorely tried over the past stretch of time.
Valentine’s day is coming, it will be my third without my lover and best friend,Chris Lierheimer. Chris was a generous mark for all the Hallmark holidays, he just loved to give cards, candy, flowers, dinners, all the trappings.
I was often too distracted to make much of this sort of thing, which generally led to a lot of frantic night-before shopping and planning. I was just glad to have my loved ones around me, and to make sure he got his special grilled steak. (And, usually something else from my namesake Victoria’s Secret, since he’s been such a good boy.)
I’ve actually been gathering the strength to look at pictures this year. The one in the previous entry is one of my favorites. My mom was a stunning woman her whole life, and this morning, before I went to work, I studied a series of pictures we had taken of Mom and Dad on their 60th wedding anniversary.
Bent and stooped, graying, they both had the goofy smiles of their youth, and their love for family and each other radiated from the picture.
When Peter posted this shot on the fourth, it took my breath away. Study it with me for a minute, will you? Jesse’s departure seems imminent. He can’t eat, thus the nasogastric tube. His body seems almost transparent. Frail, like that of a cocoon about to be shed.
Peter is vigorous, with good color and strong hands. Only in his eyes do you see the pain of a parent about to lose his firstborn son. Go to the blog now-thresholdofheaven.com- and read a remarkable story of redemption and love between this father and son.
I have found that people often avoid cancer blogs. No one likes to be reminded of their mortality, especially if one’s views of the afterlife are uncertain. Peter, like those of us who lay claim to the promises of Jesus Christ, looks forward to the day when he will see Jesse whole again.
But today is really all we have. Jesus doesn’t promise us tomorrow, only that we will be with him in Paradise. So what shall we do? Where shall we go? Shall we insulate our hearts, wrap them in airless containers to harden and fossilize? Or shall we be like Peter, and love extravagantly? Peter and his lovely wife poured their hearts into Jesse’s journey, and were broken for their faith.
But what else to do? When you love a child, a woman, or even an animal, it’s an extension of your own heart. The rewards are tremendous, and the risks, commensurate.
I have a series of pictures I would like you to see over the next few weeks, fellow Visitors. I call them the “Faces of Love”. They are from fellow travelers, and cover a different kind of landscape. One that I think you all will find just as beautiful and heartwrenching as any other landscape on the planet.
Much love,
Victoria
PS- Let me remind you to the introductions so far:
Everyone has a Story – birdmartin.wordpress.com.
Evan Sanders at thebettermanprojects.com
and finally Peter Wiebe at thresholdofheaven.com
- Posted in: Anger ♦ Anger at God ♦ cancer ♦ Cancer death ♦ Children ♦ children and cancer ♦ Christianity and cancer ♦ family ♦ Good Character ♦ Love ♦ photo essay ♦ unconditional love ♦ vulnerability
- Tagged: cancer, Children, children and death, Fathers, Grief, Real Men
Such big fingers for such a tiny body!
I did not like the photo, because photos of children record growth and moments of delight, and it seemed the man was exploiting the boy. I did not realise it was the father. And now I love the photo because it is love without shame. Showing the photo is beautiful defiance, and- celebration.
That’s exactly right, Clare, dear. Peter’s love for Jesse is unvarnished and has a certain purity. Truly an authentic “Face of Love.”
The picture was taken 2 days before Jesse’s death at his request. I wonder if he knew how much that picture would mean to me now. We also took one of him and his mom. We love you Jesse.
Peter, thank you for allowing me to share this picture and your story. I understand the heartache you are enduring. I think you are accomplishing your goal of drawing people closer to Jesus Christ by sharing Jesse’s story. It is an astonishingly beautiful picture, and I would love to publish the one of Jesse and his mom.
Victoria, if you contact me through the Contact Peter page on my blog. I could email you the picture of Jesse and his mom, if you like.
I would like that very much Peter! Please look for that!